ISIS PDF bed-sharing May 2012 FINAL – Up to date Info on Bed Sharing Safety

This information sheet summarizes research-based evidence about the risks and benefits of babies sharing an adult bed with a parent or parents and about babies’ safety.

For more information on this and many other topics, please visit

http://www.isisonline.org.uk

Many parents bring their baby into their bed to sleep, but for most UK babies this is not where they always or usually sleep. Bed-sharing usually happens for part of the night, or for a couple of nights a week, although some babies sleep all night every night in their mother’s or parents’ bed.

Although many new parents think they will never sleep with their baby, research shows that many do so, for all kinds of reasons. About 50% of UK babies have bed-shared by the time they are 3months old, and on any night of the week a fifth of all babies sleep with a parent. Most of these are babies who are being breastfed, and three quarters (70-80%) of breastfed babies sleep with their mother or parents some of the time in the early months. It is important that ALL parents are informed about bed-sharing and have thought about how they will manage night-time care.

Why do people bed-share?

People bed-share for many reasons, and in many different circumstances. Bed-sharing can happen more — or less — safely. When done accidentally, without thought for babies’ safety,it can be very dangerous. Some babies are also vulnerable due to specific risk factors.

The most common reason for bed-sharing is to breastfeed in the night. Breastfed babies nursefrequently because human milk is easily digested, and they need to do so night and day.

Frequent night-time nursing helps mothers to make sufficient milk. Many breastfeeding mothersfind bed-sharing makes night-time nursing less disruptive after the first few weeks, and motherswho bed-share generally breastfeed for more months than those who do not.

Other people bed-share for bonding, especially if they have to leave their baby during the day forwork; some do so when their baby is ill, to be able to pay close attention. Many families fromaround the world bed-share because this is their normal cultural practice. Sometimes people bed-share because they cannot afford to buy a cot/crib, or because they are sleeping in a temporaryplace without one (e.g. visiting friends/family or on holiday).

Sometimes people fall asleep with their babies accidentally, or without meaning to. This can bevery dangerous, especially if it happens on a couch/sofa or arm-chair, or after consuming alcoholor drugs. Because every night is different, parents should think about their baby’s bed-sharingsafety every time!

Bed-Sharing and Safety

Many studies have shown that falling asleep with a baby — whether planned or by accident — isvery dangerous when the adult has been drinking alcohol, or has consumed drugs (includingmedication that affects awareness during sleep), or when they are on a sofa or arm-chair.

IT IS NOT SAFE TO SLEEP WITH YOUR BABY IN THESE SITUATIONS

Bed-sharing, SIDS and risk factors

Although some bed-sharing (or sofa-sharing) infant deaths involve accidents relating to unsafe behaviour, others have no explained cause and are called SIDS (Sudden infant death syndrome),

also known as ‘cot death’. SIDS deaths happen wherever babies sleep, but studies have shown that some babies are more vulnerable than others.

Several studies around the world found that babies whose deaths were unexplained (SIDS) were more likely to have slept with an adult. More detailed investigations have shown that bed-sharing

SIDS cases usually involve a combination of bed-sharing and other factors. Smoking increases the risk of SIDS wherever a baby sleeps, but the risk is greater still when combined with bed-

sharing. The biggest risk-factor for bed-sharing SIDS is mothers’ smoking in pregnancy, followed by exposure to cigarette smoke after birth. In a large UK study the ratio of odds for SIDS to a

smoker (compared to a non-smoking mother) was 5 to 1. The odds ratio for a bed-sharing smoker was 12 to 1. Avoiding the combination of smoking and bed-sharing therefore reduces the chance of SIDS. Avoiding smoking has the biggest impact.

Other factors that increase SIDS-risk when bed-sharing include infant prematurity, and low birth-weight. There is some discussion about whether bed-sharing with a young infant (under 12 weeks

of age) may increase SIDS risk, but the research evidence is not clear cut. Although it is clear that breastfed babies have a lower risk of SIDS than those who are not breastfed, it is not clear how

the combination of breastfeeding and bed-sharing affect SIDS-risk as many other factors are usually involved.

How bed-sharing works

Adult beds are not designed to keep babies safe. Parents must do this! Look at the bed and where it is: make sure baby can’t fall into gaps between the bed and wall or other furniture. Keepbaby away from any pillows. Remove heavy bedding that might cover the baby. Think about the height of

your bed and whether you have a hard floor in case baby falls.

Studies of breastfeeding mothers and babies who

routinely bed-share show that they automatically sleep

close together, facing one another and waking at the

same time. Mothers place the baby on its back to

sleep, level with their breasts, on the mattress surface (away from pillows). The mother adopts a protective position in the bed, curled around the baby, with her arm above his head and her

knees bent under his feet. This protects the baby from cold, heat, bedding and bed-partners.

One study showed that mothers who did not breastfeed often placed their babies high in the bed, at parents’ face-height, positioned between, or on top of pillows. They did not consistently face the baby or adopt the “protective” sleep position. This suggests that bed-sharing may be less safe for non-breastfeeders, unless the above behaviour can be learned, which is unknown. A three-sided ‘bedside’, or ‘side-car’, crib which attaches to your bed may be a suitable option if you want to be close to your baby, but you have concerns about bed-sharing safety.

Before you bed-share, consider whether

you are happy it is safe for YOUR baby.

via ISIS PDF bed-sharing May 2012 FINAL – ISISPDFbed-sharingMay2012FINAL2.pdf.

Pregnant? Stay out of Nail Salons!

(CBS News) – Citizens, advocacy groups, medical professionals and companies are speaking out after a Calif. state government study found that many of the “non-toxic” nail polishes officials tested contained carcinogens or developmental toxins.

According to the study, out of the 12 nail product brands the Department of Toxic Substance Control tested that claimed they didn’t have one to three of the “toxic trio” of chemicals, only two brands were able to stand by their claims. Some of the whole sample group of 25 brands contained as much as 17.7 percent of toxic materials.

The “toxic trio” is the nickname for dibutyl phthalate (DBP), toluene and formaldehyde, three ingredients that have been known to cause adverse side effects.

“This report shows that these companies are knowingly peddling tons of toxins without even an ounce of scruples,” Miriam Yeung, executive director of the National Asian Pacific American Women’s Forum, part of the National Health Nail and Beauty Salon Alliance, told HealthPop by email. “Not only are they including dangerous chemicals in their products, but they are outright lying about it. More disturbing is that the cosmetics industry continues to be almost completely unregulated- the FDA still does not have the power it needs to keep consumers and salon workers safe. “

Calif. report reveals “non-toxic” nail polishes could cause birth defects

Dibutyl phthalate (DBP) comes from the family of phthalates, a classification of compounds known to be disrupt function of the endocrine system, Dr. Kenneth R. Spaeth, the director of the Occupational and Environmental Medicine Center’s Department of Population Health at North Shore University Hospital in Manhasset, N.Y., told HealthPop. Phthalates can alter hormone levels or disrupt the way the body handles its response to hormones. Although studies about the toxin are relatively recent, it has been known to cause birth defects, including neurological and developmental issues in fetuses.

“In a fetus, there’s felt to be greater susceptibility to the effects,” Spaeth said. “Pregnant women would be at particular concern here. Any exposure that they experience is also going to be experienced by the fetus.”

According to Spaeth, toluene is a neurotoxin that can also irritate the upper respiratory system. It has been known to harm the nervous system of people of any age, but it can cross through the placenta and reach the fetus to cause developmental defects as well.

“A lot of the mechanisms that we have in the body to protect us from these toxins are not developed so there’s greater susceptibility because of that and because of their size,” he said.

Formaldehyde is a known carcinogen that is also known to cause respiratory problems and can exacerbate problems in people with asthma and other breathing issues, Spaeth commented.

While he said that the problem could be a concern for people who go to nail salons frequently, it’s more of a bigger problem for people who work with the products. Poor ventilation and improper equipment – like using the wrong masks – can lead to health problems. Spaeth says it’s fairly common to see nail salon workers with breathing problems.

Part of the problem lies in the fact that many nail salon workers are of different ethnicities and may not have a command of the English language warnings. The report found that 59 to 80 percent of nail salon workers in California are of Vietnamese decent, and English was not their primary language.

“Physically, I can tell after eight or ten hours working, the chemicals give you very bad headache and affects you mentally. My eyes itch. My nose itch. But as soon as I walk outside the salon, I feel much better. I hope the state government think about this and make it by law that if you say ‘no’ and you have it, they have to have punishment or penalty,” Tina Bui, who has been a manicurist for 17 years in Marin County, Calif, told the Associated Press.

Spaeth and Yeung said more needs to be done to protect these workers. Spaeth urged that people need to be educated about potential dangers in their native language.

“Immigrants find themselves performing job tasks that are higher risk and that often exposes them to chemicals or hazardous situations because of their inability to understand or speak the language,” he said. “They aren’t always educated about the risk.”

Nail polish company Zoya, which was tested in the study, told HealthPop that not only did they strive to be free of the three chemicals and other toxins. The vegan-friendly brand was one of two brands whose claims that they were “3 free” were substantiated by the study. The polish was developed in 1992 by pianist turned cosmetologist, Zoya Reyzis, and her husband Michael, who had previously worked in the medical field, to be a healthier alternative nail polish.

“Today, Zoya Nail Polish and Treatments remains committed to a proactive approach to developing quality, toxin free products,” a Zoya spokesperson told HealthPop in a statement.

It’s important to note that some of the brands included in the California study may not be considered to be top nail polish companies.

“(The Nail Manufacturers Council) condemns any manufacturer misleading customers about the ingredients in their products,” Myra Irizarry, director of government affairs for the Nail Manufacturers Council, told the Associated Press. “The public should, however, be aware that nearly the entire nail polish industry voluntarily took steps years ago to remove toluene and DBP from their products.”

Popular polish brand OPI told HealthPop that the major salon brands have improved their formulas to get rid of these chemicals. The study determined that although they didn’t label their products as “3 Free,” they were in fact devoid of the toxins.

“The lesson of the study is that consumers should ask for, and use, brands they know and trust,” OPI told HealthPop.

© 2012 CBS Interactive Inc. All Rights Reserved.

via Concerned advocates, companies respond to Calif. “toxic” nail polish report – HealthPop – CBS News.

Cambridge Documentary Films | Our Films | BirthMarkings

WATCH A CLIP ONLINE: http://www.cambridgedocumentaryfilms.org/filmsPages/birthmarkings.html

BirthMarkings is a 19 minute documentary about how giving birth transforms our bodies. The film reframes and destabilizes the observer’s reaction to the changes in a woman’s body after she’s given birth. The Film refocuses on the dynamism and lives experiences rather than the commodified image. Women talk with ambivalence, humor and love about the scars, marks and stretched skin that brands them as mothers.

What they say about “BirthMarkings”

“A beautiful and very important film.”

Cornelia vanderZeil, MD, author, Big Beautiful and Pregnant

“Startlingly original…Fantastic to use in women and gender studies.” Robbie Pfeufer Kahn, Professor of Sociology, UVM, author of Bearing Meaning: The Language of Birth

“Understanding and loving our post-birth bodies is an essential part of childbirth education. What our media culture pushes as a problem, This film reframes as a path to appreciation and thankfulness. The film opens our eyes with beauty, grace and profound emotional understanding.”

Judy Norsigian, executive director of Our Bodies Ourselves

Awards and Screenings

Winner of Best Documentary, Ovation Film Festival

Screened at numerous festivals including:

The International Museum of Women

New England Film Festival Online

The LA Short Film Festival

The Real to Reel Film Festival

The Edmonton Film Festival

The Provincetown Film Festival

The Best of Fest Film Festival

The LACMA

The Boston Museum of Fine Arts

The Women’s Media Action Film Festival

Community Choice Selection

via Cambridge Documentary Films | Our Films | BirthMarkings.

thegodmolecule: here is a tribe in Africa where…

here is a tribe in Africa where the birth date of a child is counted not from when they were born, nor from when they are conceived but from the day that the child was a thought in its mother’s mind. And when a woman decides that she will have a child, she goes off and sits under a tree, by herself, and she listens until she can hear the song of the child that wants to come. And after she’s heard the song of this child, she comes back to the man who will be the child’s father, and teaches it to him. And then, when they make love to physically conceive the child, some of that time they sing the song of the child, as a way to invite it.

And then, when the mother is pregnant, the mother teaches that child’s song to the midwives and the old women of the village, so that when the child is born, the old women and the people around her sing the child’s song to welcome it. And then, as the child grows up, the other villagers are taught the child’s song. If the child falls, or hurts its knee, someone picks it up and sings its song to it. Or perhaps the child does something wonderful, or goes through the rites of puberty, then as a way of honoring this person, the people of the village sing his or her song.

In the African tribe there is one other occasion upon which the villagers sing to the child. If at any time during his or her life, the person commits a crime or aberrant social act, the individual is called to the center of the village and the people in the community form a circle around them. Then they sing their song to them.

The tribe recognizes that the correction for antisocial behavior is not punishment; it is love and the remembrance of identity. When you recognize your own song, you have no desire or need to do anything that would hurt another.

And it goes this way through their life. In marriage, the songs are sung, together. And finally, when this child is lying in bed, ready to die, all the villagers know his or her song, and they sing—for the last time—the song to that person.

You may not have grown up in an African tribe that sings your song to you at crucial life transitions, but life is always reminding you when you are in tune with yourself and when you are not. When you feel good, what you are doing matches your song, and when you feel awful, it doesn’t. In the end, we shall all recognize our song and sing it well. You may feel a little warbly at the moment, but so have all the great singers. Just keep singing and you’ll find your way home.

This is so sweet.

(via empressmo)

via thegodmolecule: here is a tribe in Africa where….

Vera’s Ecstatic Almost Water Birth Story

Hubby holding my hand while in the birthing pool

I feel so blessed and incredibly empowered by the amazing, loving, spiritual, and peaceful birth of my beautiful baby Vera. Birth doesn’t have to be scary, it can be the most incredible and ecstatic experience a woman can ever have, I am living proof!

Getting Labor Started

The week that Vera was born I had turned 39 weeks pregnant, which was messing with my head a lot at first because Elena was born in my 39th week of pregnancy. So I started trying some mild natural ways to move things along. On Sunday my doula came for a visit and I was feeling anxious and so excited for the birth because after talking about it with her, we decided to say “screw you!”, to my current scheduled place of birth so we could have our baby at the hospital with one of the lowest c-section rates in the state, and so I could labor in the water.

On Monday I had a prenatal massage, which actually wasn’t that great during, but I felt great after it was over! I tried to have a good cry for a release of emotions and stress hormones by watching a sad movie, so I put on The Pianist. I didn’t end up crying, just tearing up a little. But I had a good cry later that week, getting emotional about Elena and how I wanted so much to be the best mommy I could for her.

On Tuesday I took Elena to play at my mom’s house and she made us dinner and I got to sit and the backyard with my parents and Elena and just chill.

On Wednesday my dad came with Elena and I to Fairy Tale Town which was on my list of things to do before baby came. Later that day we met my mom and youngest sister for pizza downtown, it was such a fun time!

On Thursday I had my doctor’s appointment with my favorite OB that I had met so far. We found that I was now 3cm dilated after only being about a finger tip dilated two weeks before! Still 80% effaced and everything else looked great. She brought up having an induction if Vera didn’t come soon, and I said I would only be open to it if I passed the 41 week mark. Isn’t it strange that they just can’t expect a baby to come on its own the natural way? I started taking evening primrose that day and had some braxton hicks contractions later that evening. A false alarm! I was sad that the contractions stopped. That’s when I got emotional and had a good cry on my husband’s shoulder.

Our Birth Story

On Friday April 12th I took a beautiful evening walk around our apartment complex with Elena. She loves flowers and loves to pick them, so we walked around doing that and chasing ducks, and everything was calm and peaceful and warm. I got Elena to bed early that night so that my husband and I could have some alone time, which I must say was awesome! Later that night I was lying in bed trying to sleep when I started feeling contractions low in my uterus. I think they started around midnight, so I decided to continue lying down and focus on them so that they wouldn’t stop. They were fairly strong and already lasting a minute, and were about five minutes apart! It was around 1:00am when I got up to tell my husband who was on the computer in the living room. I relaxed on the couch while he timed my contractions, still lasting over a minute with five minutes in between, and they were strong. They slowed a little when I stopped focusing on them to call my mom and my doula, and to text everyone else who needed to know I was in labor. My husband was hurrying around getting things ready to go and cleaning up our kitchen while I sat on the birth ball laboring and talking to my mom who came over to stay with Elena.

My doula arrived soon after my mom and reminded me that my contractions were so strong and consistent already since I had been 3cm dilated and bypassed all the early labor contractions that I had with my first labor. We decided to leave a little earlier for the hospital in case Elena woke up because I didn’t want to have to leave her while she was upset and tired. We were on our way to the hospital around 3:30am. Contractions were strong, but I wouldn’t call any of my labor process painful. as long as I breathed through them and focused, I was handling them fine.

We got to the birth center and they monitored the baby and I for twenty minutes on a hospital bed. In between contractions My husband, my doula and I were talking and laughing. I said I had the song Afternoon Delight stuck in my head during one of our conversations and they laughed, and my doula said that now she had it stuck in her head! Ha ha! My husband was right there for every contraction, I couldn’t get through one without holding on to him at that point. My doula was there to talk me through the tougher contractions and it felt great when she rubbed my back in between. I got sick and threw up once, a sign that transition was either here or approaching quickly, and my doula said that she loved it when moms got sick because it helped dilation. Our wonderful nurse Juliette checked me and I was at 6cm dilated, and informed us that unfortunately I could not deliver Vera in the water because I was missing a blood test for some type of hepatitis that they did not do for me at the previous hospital, but I could still labor in there. So she got the birthing pool ready and left the room again. It almost over flowed, luckily my doula noticed and turned it off! They bailed off some water and helped me climb inside. And when I got in…euphoria! it was instant wonderful, tantalizing, heavenly relief! My doula said it was better than the epidural, and I can imagine that she is right! Wow, it felt amazing!

I leaned over the tub on my knees, holding on to Vlad who was on the other side, not in the water. My doula was to my right side and she had lit all of the candles surrounding me in the tub. Vlad asked me to turn and look behind me, but I didn’t want to move. I didn’t want to break the labor spell so to speak, to lose my focus and thus lose my control over the waves of contractions. I had to stay on top, focus on my breathing. I was shocked to find that I had minutes of rest in between contractions after being dehydrated in my first labor had sent them one on top of another. I wasn’t in the water long before I could feel that I was in transition. I could feel my body opening up and my baby descending with each incredible wave. The feeling was indescribable and powerful. It wasn’t painful, it was transcendent. Juliette checked the baby’s heartbeat with a doppler in the water. Then I started to feel the need to push, and those contractions were admittedly a little scary, thank goodness for my husband and doula to keep me focused and grounded, for keeping my pushing noises and moans low and effective. I felt my water break, felt the little pop and the water rushing out around me.While I was still in the water I reached down a couple of times to feel for the baby’s head. If I wasn’t afraid of what my body was doing I think I would have pushed her head out right there in the water! But I was holding back a little, and Juliette came in and wanted to check my progress. I could not speak or explain to anyone that her head was right there! I was hoping they would understand by what I was doing (reaching to check for her head) and by the sounds I was making.

They helped me out of the water, and I had a contraction right there in front of the tub, and suddenly her head was crowning and I was paralyzed, I could not move my legs! The only thing I could say was, “I can’t move, I can’t move!”. They wanted me to squat down, but I couldn’t get myself to move, I couldn’t say she was coming even though I knew, I couldn’t speak. Then suddenly I birthed her head with the next contraction and I heard Juliette yell for the OB who came in the room fast. I heard the OB say that she didn’t think I was in a very good position to push, and well, I knew I wasn’t and couldn’t go anywhere else! As soon as I heard my doula say that her head was out and all I needed to do was let her come, I let go of the fear that was gripping my body and just let it do its thing. I moved my left leg open and to the side and delivered my baby with the next contraction! She was put into my arms, and I walked over to the bed to lie down with my baby on my chest, her cord still attached.

!I felt like I was in a dream, I told everyone that I was afraid I was going to wake up pregnant because every thing felt so surreal. It was unbelievable! We got to the hospital sometime before 4am and Vera was delivered at exactly 6:30am, weighed 7lbs 8 ounces and was a little over 19 inches long. It was such an incredible experience, more beautiful than I thought my birth experience could possibly be, but definitely the birth that I had prepared for, hoped for, and prayed for.

Vera is the sweetest and calmest little baby, and we are all so in love with her. I am so happy I could give her such a beautiful entrance into life in this world. A welcoming that was so gentle, peaceful and loving. The whole experience and my two girls are truly a miracle and a gift from God, and I will be grateful every day of my life for these blessings.

The birthing pool surrounded by candles

Minutes after Vera’s birth

Later that day in the postpartum recovery room

Sweet baby Vera

April Birthdays and Pregnancy Reflections

BFP at 12dpo, my first positive test!

I have been counting down to April using special events as markers of progress or milestones reached, most of which were holidays or fun events for our family to do with Elena. The first half was slow until we reached the holidays and time seemed to go a little faster, and even faster after the New Year.

Looking back on this pregnancy, I see a long and tough first trimester with things turning around at the very beginning of the third trimester. I was having horrible morning sickness all day and night and most of the time I was dead tired and could pretty much sleep any time any where. My husband really helped me through by stepping up and taking over the kitchen completely, becoming the family chef and dish washer, and being a great daddy.

He really came through for Elena’s 2nd Birthday Party in September (as he always does), and even though he got really sick that day himself, but through our misery I got so much joy from seeing Elena have fun and from being with my most wonderful family at the park in the shade.

We conceived our baby in July, and I announced that we were pregnant in August when I got my first real positive test and everyone (my family) was driving to Santa Cruz that day, while we were fixed to leave the next day. Those early weeks were so awesome food wise because I was not yet sick and I was putting away food like an elephant! And speaking of elephant as we made our way to Santa Cruz that next day we had the best lunch at the Ele.phant Bar in a back room alone where we enjoyed ourselves and Elena could be her toddler self.

When I saw her on the beach looking at the ocean for the first time, she was so so excited and happy that it is a moment I will never forget and I have been dying to go back to the beach ever since! She also had a blast on the rides and we got a lot of video of her sweet smiles and waving at us.

In October it was Elena’s first time trick or treating and she was a pro, dressed as Rapunzel with a jack-o-lantern candy bag. She has been candy obsessed ever since I got pregnant really, since I was too tired to be super strict about it. Vlad also celebrated is 32nd birthday that night and we all had a lot of fun.

I cooked a feast for Thanksgiving including stuffing, ham, green bean casserole, a couple other dishes, and hubby made a most succulent turkey. My dad and grandpa came over to eat and later we got to go to my aunt’s for more great family and food. I was so happy that I was able to eat and not feeling as sick at that point, though I was completely exhausted!

In December I bought tons of dollar store Christmas decor for our tree and apartment. I made a gingerbread house and cookies with Elena, though she was interested more in eating the candy than decorating with it. We watched lots of Christmas movies and Elena’s first song sung ever ended up being Santa Claus is Coming to town, to which she would add the words, “to bring presents me!”. Too adorable! Seeing her open her own gifts Christmas morning and being excited was also something I will never forget. We rung in the New Year at my mom’s and I was really wishing I could have had some wine or champagne that night.

For Valentines Day my grandma and mom joined Elena, hubby and I to Dis.ney on ice which featured Elena’s favorite princesses. Too much cotton candy made an intermission meltdown, but we made it through without a scratch lol. She was so cute though, clapping and turning around to make sure that every single one of us was clapping too! When Vlad and I took Elena to the ice show the first time it was much more of a success in that there was no meltdown and it was a great first family moment. That first show was around her birthday sometime in the fall.

I had been telling Elena throughout the pregnancy that baby Vera would come out after the Easter Bunny came to hide eggs, so March was a huge milestone to pass up in this pregnancy. We colored eggs for the first time together in our kitchen the night before Easter, and Elena was very proud of them. We had the best Easter morning at my mom’s with an amazing home-made breakfast. It was a relaxing Easter morning and the sky was gorgeous and heavenly after a night of a thunder and lightning rain storm. Then we went exploring Old Sac with Vlad’s best friends and Elena’s God papa and had a nice seafood dinner.

Throughout my pregnancy I have been worried about Elena and making sure I do lots of fun things for her before the baby is born. Reflecting on this pregnancy has really given me a better perspective because it is so hard to see the big picture on a day-to-day basis when I want some time for myself, or having to take time to clean the apartment, and some days not making it to the park or even making it outside on some days. But looking back now I can see that I have been putting her first the whole time, and I am still trying.

My birthday marked the very last milestone I was waiting to get to before the baby is born because it also marked the beginning of week 38! Elena was born during my 39th week of pregnancy. I was hoping for some special moments with her yesterday on my birthday and we definitely got some memorable ones. My mom took us to pick up the cake and then my family just relaxed and drank tea here while the kids played for a while. Then we were outside and Elena was throwing things in the duck pond, got too close, and fell in for the first time! Poor thing! At least it was shallow, she sort of walked/tripped into the water up to her chest.

Probably the best moments for her and I were relaxing on the couch after her bath, and then this morning when she woke up happy and calm and we just stayed in bed for a while chatting and cuddling. I told her that baby Vera was getting big and that she would come out soon and she replied, “No she not big, just little!”. And she is right, though I know Vera has been growing because I woke up to some new birthday stretch marks yesterday ha ha! She really likes my left side, and she was a very busy girl after 10:00 last night.

Before my birthday I was so worried about how hard and stressful things might be with Elena after the baby is born, but I’m not any more. I feel like she will be a wonderful big sister and that the welcoming of Vera into our family will be a smooth and happy one. I am looking forward to her birth and my husband and doula being by my side. The next big thing for Elena will be meeting her baby sister for the first time, and I can’t wait to see how happy and fascinated she will be with baby Vera!

Belly shots at 37 weeks!

37 weeks pregnant and the countdown is really on! My bellybutton is popped out a lot and the spot where my belly piercing was looks like a little slit that is about an inch above my bellybutton now. I have a small stretch-mark that runs up along that area and I wonder if it’s there because I took my piercing out too late in my last pregnancy or if I would have gotten a stretch-mark there regardless. Either way I am not too concerned, I don’t have any new stretch-marks, but I did get some bad varicose veins in my right leg again! They went away after my last pregnancy, so hopefully they will disappear again after this pregnancy!.

At my doctor’s visit I was “a fingertip dilated and 80% effaced”, not that this information tells me much about when I will give birth seeing as a woman could have a closed cervix in the morning and have her baby later that night! Or a mom could be dilated to four centimeters for three weeks or longer without any other signs of birth! So I am not concerned with this info, nor do I care to have any more pelvic exams. The OBs have not been particularly gentle, and I don’t want anything getting messed with in there! The OB said Vera’s head was very low, she has been head down for a while now which I am happy about. If she decides to come early or even around my due date than I have about 20 days or less till I go into labor!

When I asked the office staff if I could opt out of pelvic exams they actually had to go back and ask if it was ok. It turns out it is ok, but they were really hush hush and acting like it was a big secret or something. Is it that big of a deal to refuse a pelvic exam? They can tell how my baby is doing from measurements of my belly and by the baby’s heartbeat, so I don’t see a problem with it now. I also hope they weren’t too surprised when I asked for a female doctor for my appointment next week, the reason is because I don’t really like the male OB that my appointment was scheduled with, it is so not so much the fact that he is a man. He was just to distracting, asking a bunch of questions about my tattoo instead of giving me information about the baby. I love the last OB I saw, she took a lot of time with me this last visit and she listened to the heartbeat for a good while, so that totally made up for the last appointment. And she was really excited for me! So that was a nice feeling and affirmation that Vera is getting closer to entering the world!

I have still been nesting like crazy, cleaning, organizing and preparing as much as I can. It’s so fun and feels great when I accomplish a “nesting goal” now, and I am so thankful that I am not dead tired like I was in the beginning and middle of pregnancy. Not that I don’t have some dead tired days right now, but it is much better than it was, I am able to function! Time for more nesting today and some more precious quality time with Elena!